Tuesday, November 13, 2012

contact, contact, contact, contact, contact

Did you ever say a word over and over again until you couldn't say it anymore and it seemed completely weird?  Just a normal word--nothing fancy; say, contact or, even, weird.

Or, have you ever spelled a word correctly, and it doesn't look right?  So, you spell it about three or four different ways to see if any of those look correct.   Say, occasion then ocassion then occassion. And, you end up going with your original spelling even though it still doesn't look quite right. Later, you look the word up in a dictionary, and you were right the entire time.

My sister and I would repeat words into oblivion, then dissolve into giggles.  We'd usually be sitting in one of our back bedrooms on pale green carpet next to our beds somewhere in the little kid activity schedule of eating, sleeping, playing, and growing up to be overly analytical.

Sometimes I catch myself doing that same exercise with my life.  Every once and a while, I'll wake up, start up my routine, and it doesn't seem right.  So, I tweak the schedule.  I'll have a cookie for breakfast instead of oatmeal.  Journal more to figure out what's going on. Or... go into full-on existential crisis mode.  Why am I here?  Does my life serve any real purpose?  Do I do anything worthy of my carbon footprint?  (I actually said that to someone yesterday. Oops.)  And, it turns into this dark, soupy mind loop but minus the giggling.

But, full-on existential crisis mode takes a lot of emotional and psychological energy, which leads to an early bedtime or, if I'm lucky, a nap.  Then, the universal elixir, sleep, set things right.  Oatmeal and routine are okay once again.

No comments: