who wants a single cohesive narrative when you could have this?

I'm a hypocrite: I teach writing in an orderly fashion. But, a single cohesive narrative is simply not in the cards tonight, friends, even though that's what I teach most days. It isn't in the cards. What cards?

On an early evening whim, I headed to the Wednesday night service at the church in which I grew up. A large part of my motivation was food; those women can cook. I ended up going to the tough questions class that dealt with "How do you deal with the atrocities done in the name of Christianity" and "What does the Bible say about homosexuality?" The class lived up to its name. I'm not sure I can give an anecdote this close to having gone. I was getting really frustrated with this enthusiastic, misinformed chap perched in the seat directly in front of me. His inane and spiteful comments irked me until suddenly they seemed hilarious and I'd get the giggles every time he said something ridiculous. He even said that "the crusades were necessary". You scare me. "Homosexuality is an abomination." Um, last time I checked, all sin is fundamentally odious to God. From the discussion, I did realize my point of departure from most of the people in the room is that I think there is nothing fundamentally sacred about the nuclear family. The nuclear family isn't a biblical concept the best I can tell.

The evening reminded me: a) I'm in odd place, having gone to seminary (I've read a lot about, gone to lectures on and written papers on stuff most people think about in passing), b) I'm odd, c) this isn't the church for me, and d) Church is hard... in a good way.

I keep hoping that I'll happen upon the equivalent to St. Johns here, but it isn't going to happen. Or, even Chapel Hill Bible the era I attended. The lack of a church to call home makes me think that I'm not going to end up here, but, then again, maybe I just need to pick one and muscle through the angst and longing for kinship.

Speaking of odd, I'm excited about sewing Saturday. I can't wait to wear my new skirt and dress!! And, today I was daydreaming about walking through McAdenville at night to see the Christmas lights. And, I want to go ice skating outside somewhere this holiday season! And, hear Handel's Messiah.

* note to self: perhaps this quantity push isn't for the best. Maybe I should have theme nights or wait patiently until I have a cool story.