My brother makes fun of me for being completely predictable and for good reason. I read Christ Plays in 10,000 Places, wrote, and ran today. I played on FaceBook-- there's a lot of stuff I couldn't do from my BlackBerry (that's my excuse). I did the map of all the cities I've been to, which was fun. It was a good review of 2010-- well, at least the summer. I had so much fun on the Galapagos, especially Isabella.
This holiday season has made me realize that I need to seek out my friends more. Why do I let it be so long between calls for people I adore? I've had great conversations over food and the phone with people that make me happy. There's a warm afterglow to a conversation with a friend that makes even washing dishes more pleasant. And, no doubt topics of the conversations will plop out into my writing and other conversations. So, I invited a friend to dinner who accepted then canceled; therefore, I was forced to eat a lot of cookies and drink milk for dinner! I was going to try to make grilled cheese sandwiches with brie but settled for chocolate chip cookies.
Scurrying at the back of my mind are my goals for 2011. Some are obvious: find a job for September, run a race a month (do I train for a marathon or ultra?), read, blog. Of course even the obvious goals need specifications. Then, there's the question how do you make spiritual goals? I can prioritize quiet time, reading Scripture, etc. It's like planning to fall in love but a surer bet. Maybe even cooking and not watching TV count towards spiritual awakening. Perhaps, word choice counts too. I should be more cognizant of the weightiness of words. And Eugene Peterson writes about hurry and procrastination being bad too-- they distort the sacredness of time. Perhaps, I should redirect my gaze from my navel to God. I need to go on a God-hunt every day figure out where he met me in my day-- isn't that what Marva Dawn refers to it as?
I actually tried doing some work, but my computer wouldn't open the CD. It must be because I haven't gotten Microsoft Office yet. So, I settled on cleaning out my inbox for 30 minutes... and I put a 10% dent into it. Yikes.
And, I've decided I'm going to write a book this year-- 300 pages 12 font double-spaced. How's that for specificity? I have ideas for 17 chapters. I've already outlined two. Boo yah.
Perhaps I should make it a goal that my posts have a point?
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
The King's Speech & The Fighter
The King's Speech is a superb movie: well written, well acted. Tonight I went to see The Fighter. It was well acted and believable but hard. There was a lot of violence and harshness in The Fighter. In The King's Speech, the emotional brutality was equal but mitigated by elegance and wit.
The stories are roughly the same: hero overcoming obstacles (Bertie had the speech impediment, Micky poor management and training), dysfunctional family, a crucial/defining moment (Bertie the speech, Micky the title fight), an older brother failing at his chance (David falling in love with Wallis Simpson, Dicky's addiction to crack), both felt they had failed people's expectations, both protagonists were spurned on by their wife/girlfriend, the conflict was ultimately internal (Bertie not being defined by his stutter, Micky letting go of his ties to his family). Both movies were based on real people.
Coming out of The Fighter, I felt like I had been roughed up. My mom's words "It sucks to be poor" came to mind. Micky's mom was self-absorbed and greedy. He didn't have education and exposure to alternatives. All the cards were out on the table in Micky's family. There were manipulators and bad guys, but nothing was ever left to innuendo.
Whereas, Bertie had to deal with loneliness and being surrounded by sychophants. One could call it death by protocol reminiscent of the line from The Madness of King George: "I had forgotten how to seem." As long as the lips were curled in a smile, mouths could utter poisonous words. The most brutal scene of the two movies was between brothers Bertie and David. David purposely misunderstood Bertie and attacked him at his most vulnerable point in a jocular tone. And the other scene between Bertie and his father was almost as brutal-- both render the stutterer speechless.
There was no seeming in The Fighter. If a character had a problem with another character, they'd inevitably duke it out. Energy wasn't wasted on wit. Even the girls got into fist fights.
At one level, the movies served as a reminder that the human condition is the same whether one is poor or rich. No socio economic level has a monopoly on dysfunctional families, heavy expectations, true love, internal conflict, or greatness. One needs good friends, common sense and determination.
Overall, I enjoyed The King's Speech far more than The Fighter. Mark Wahlberg and Christian Bale did a fantastic job, but the movie was too violent on too many levels for me. The King's Speech subtlety and elegance made the story more enjoyable and allowed for more humor.
The stories are roughly the same: hero overcoming obstacles (Bertie had the speech impediment, Micky poor management and training), dysfunctional family, a crucial/defining moment (Bertie the speech, Micky the title fight), an older brother failing at his chance (David falling in love with Wallis Simpson, Dicky's addiction to crack), both felt they had failed people's expectations, both protagonists were spurned on by their wife/girlfriend, the conflict was ultimately internal (Bertie not being defined by his stutter, Micky letting go of his ties to his family). Both movies were based on real people.
Coming out of The Fighter, I felt like I had been roughed up. My mom's words "It sucks to be poor" came to mind. Micky's mom was self-absorbed and greedy. He didn't have education and exposure to alternatives. All the cards were out on the table in Micky's family. There were manipulators and bad guys, but nothing was ever left to innuendo.
Whereas, Bertie had to deal with loneliness and being surrounded by sychophants. One could call it death by protocol reminiscent of the line from The Madness of King George: "I had forgotten how to seem." As long as the lips were curled in a smile, mouths could utter poisonous words. The most brutal scene of the two movies was between brothers Bertie and David. David purposely misunderstood Bertie and attacked him at his most vulnerable point in a jocular tone. And the other scene between Bertie and his father was almost as brutal-- both render the stutterer speechless.
There was no seeming in The Fighter. If a character had a problem with another character, they'd inevitably duke it out. Energy wasn't wasted on wit. Even the girls got into fist fights.
At one level, the movies served as a reminder that the human condition is the same whether one is poor or rich. No socio economic level has a monopoly on dysfunctional families, heavy expectations, true love, internal conflict, or greatness. One needs good friends, common sense and determination.
Overall, I enjoyed The King's Speech far more than The Fighter. Mark Wahlberg and Christian Bale did a fantastic job, but the movie was too violent on too many levels for me. The King's Speech subtlety and elegance made the story more enjoyable and allowed for more humor.
my new laundromat
So, I'm using all natural light, sitting in a comfy chair in a spacious kitchen, listening to classical music all while my laundry is washing and drying. I'm playing with my new computer of course. Plus, I got taken out to eat. I'm at my aunt's house! And all I bring to the table is: company.
My aunt has moved her office to her house, and she misses people. She says it's harder to get work done. I told her found that to be true in grad school. People are a built in security system when it comes to procrastination. When my roommate is home, I may not be working on the most pressing task, but I'm forced into doing something. But my roommate is dog sitting this week, which has been very relaxing. I've done a lot of reading and journaling. The type of work that's filed under "ruminate"-- the kind of work that looks like slacking to the naked eye. But, I need this rumination to prepare for the new year. But, the quotidian tasks don't mysteriously disappear.
So, I'm getting my busy-bee work done at my aunt's. I'm doing laundry, making my TDLs, cleaning out my inboxes, and blogging about the work I'm supposed to be doing.
My aunt has moved her office to her house, and she misses people. She says it's harder to get work done. I told her found that to be true in grad school. People are a built in security system when it comes to procrastination. When my roommate is home, I may not be working on the most pressing task, but I'm forced into doing something. But my roommate is dog sitting this week, which has been very relaxing. I've done a lot of reading and journaling. The type of work that's filed under "ruminate"-- the kind of work that looks like slacking to the naked eye. But, I need this rumination to prepare for the new year. But, the quotidian tasks don't mysteriously disappear.
So, I'm getting my busy-bee work done at my aunt's. I'm doing laundry, making my TDLs, cleaning out my inboxes, and blogging about the work I'm supposed to be doing.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
long lost love
I found you! Ha. I broke down and bought a computer today so I can blog.
Confession/Narrative Tale of how I came to own a brand new 13" MacBook
I bought my other computer refurbished in September 2005. I've been in denial of its deathlike condition for over a year-- I could never call in computer hospice because it could perform some of its functions sometimes. And, I hate how Mr. The Man designs technology to be obsolete in three years. It's amoral, and I feel icky being involved in the system. But, here I am.
My sister makes fun of my Mac addiction to my face: "It doesn't make you cooler." I know. How could I possibly get cooler? I'm already at the pinnacle (comment on that). So not to be a Steve Job drone, I tried a Dell for about a week last April. But, I couldn't do it. I just didn't like it. Then, I traveled all summer. Then, I nestled back into my work routine and got busy sans computer.
One day, I looked at my blog. It'd been two months since my last entry! It'd be one thing if I'd given birth and breast-feeding every two hours. Lactation and motherhood are decent excuses. A broken computer is not. A broken computer is easy enough to remedy if I'm willing to go on a financial fast, which I just signed onto.
I've missed blogging-- the discipline of sitting down on a regular basis to put together some paragraphs together. I don't write genius, but it is the quotidian that makes up the majority of life. Writing sorts out my messy thoughts and feelings. It reminds me of the shape and Author of my life.
So, I'm back in the saddle.
Confession/Narrative Tale of how I came to own a brand new 13" MacBook
I bought my other computer refurbished in September 2005. I've been in denial of its deathlike condition for over a year-- I could never call in computer hospice because it could perform some of its functions sometimes. And, I hate how Mr. The Man designs technology to be obsolete in three years. It's amoral, and I feel icky being involved in the system. But, here I am.
My sister makes fun of my Mac addiction to my face: "It doesn't make you cooler." I know. How could I possibly get cooler? I'm already at the pinnacle (comment on that). So not to be a Steve Job drone, I tried a Dell for about a week last April. But, I couldn't do it. I just didn't like it. Then, I traveled all summer. Then, I nestled back into my work routine and got busy sans computer.
One day, I looked at my blog. It'd been two months since my last entry! It'd be one thing if I'd given birth and breast-feeding every two hours. Lactation and motherhood are decent excuses. A broken computer is not. A broken computer is easy enough to remedy if I'm willing to go on a financial fast, which I just signed onto.
I've missed blogging-- the discipline of sitting down on a regular basis to put together some paragraphs together. I don't write genius, but it is the quotidian that makes up the majority of life. Writing sorts out my messy thoughts and feelings. It reminds me of the shape and Author of my life.
So, I'm back in the saddle.
Monday, October 25, 2010
defeat in battle
Today was rough. Bureaucracy was in full bloom. Everywhere I went, there it was. "They" took my mentor away and assigned a new one-- as if I can just build a relationship like that. It was especially ironic after having gone to multiple workshops on the importance of relationship in teaching.
And, my principal sprung an observation on me by Friday, which is just a lot of extra paperwork and two extra meetings the week report card grades are due. I think I'm going to tell her I'll do it Tuesday of next week. And, I've decided to start running in the morning-- 5am. I figure that the perfect week to start doesn't exist. The weather is nice. So that's something. I'll just go to bed early tomorrow to make up for the change in wake-up time. It's only a 40 minute difference. It shouldn't be that hard, right? Since it's getting dark at night, it'll be safer to run in the morning because traffic is lighter.
My relationships are all out of whack, and I guess that would put me to blame. But, I swear there's something more to it. Life is just really heavy and sticky right now.
I did email a contact to help me start looking for jobs for next year. So, that worry is a little lighter.
And, my principal sprung an observation on me by Friday, which is just a lot of extra paperwork and two extra meetings the week report card grades are due. I think I'm going to tell her I'll do it Tuesday of next week. And, I've decided to start running in the morning-- 5am. I figure that the perfect week to start doesn't exist. The weather is nice. So that's something. I'll just go to bed early tomorrow to make up for the change in wake-up time. It's only a 40 minute difference. It shouldn't be that hard, right? Since it's getting dark at night, it'll be safer to run in the morning because traffic is lighter.
My relationships are all out of whack, and I guess that would put me to blame. But, I swear there's something more to it. Life is just really heavy and sticky right now.
I did email a contact to help me start looking for jobs for next year. So, that worry is a little lighter.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
mom on david gray
One time as I listened to David Gray's early album at my mom's house, she mentioned that he was clearly British. I asked, "Could you tell by his accent?" She said, "No, his diction. His word choice is clearly British; an American would never use some of those words."
She's right. Although his music has improved over time, his lyrics lack the prophetic passion his earlier work had. There's a poetry and accuracy within his early stuff. It's as if he went to LA and learned how to be shallow. As if he fell in love with a blond, got a tan, and penned "Please Forgive Me" and "Babylon" in lieu of "Let the Truth Sting." Not that "Please Forgive Me" isn't a great song; it just lacks scope and magnitude. Yes, there's universality in particularity, but there's also a place for the poetic pointing finger calling us out. Please forgive me, I miss the old David Gray.
She's right. Although his music has improved over time, his lyrics lack the prophetic passion his earlier work had. There's a poetry and accuracy within his early stuff. It's as if he went to LA and learned how to be shallow. As if he fell in love with a blond, got a tan, and penned "Please Forgive Me" and "Babylon" in lieu of "Let the Truth Sting." Not that "Please Forgive Me" isn't a great song; it just lacks scope and magnitude. Yes, there's universality in particularity, but there's also a place for the poetic pointing finger calling us out. Please forgive me, I miss the old David Gray.
fun with fritattas
I have never made a fritatta, and I'm not sure I've eaten one. But, I got curious because I heard about them, and they seem like an easy quiche. And, I thought the word sounded Spanish. I was wrong: it's Italian for omelette. However, I think I want to make a spinach and mushroom one after I finish up my casseroles.
I had my brother over for dinner. He was an easy guest. Of course, I wasn't at my apartment when he got there. I was on a a beer walk (he once noted, "J, I'm not gay. I don't drink red wine or hot tea.") So, things didn't run smoothly, but that's part of the fun. Hospitality feels a lot like teaching in that respect. He said he liked the salmon casserole better than the Mexican one when he was prepared to enjoy the Mexican. I like how easy going he is-- I had chips and salsa out on the table then served yeast rolls. He didn't blink an eye. Then, "for entertainment", we went on a walk and swung on the elementary school swings and talked about life and jobs. I had a great time. Of course, he's had years of practice with my antics.
So, I borrowed "Love Walked In" by Marisa De Los Santos from the library because my sister said she could see me writing some of the sentences in it. That piqued my interest: what kind of sentences would I write? It looks like chit lit (bad); it's a NYT bestseller (less bad).
I've finished my homework for my Bible study, but haven't done the writing assigment for my Spanish class. I'm supposed to write a single's want ad peppered with reflexive verbs. If I do it, I'll just write random sentences with "me gusta" and "nos preocupa", etc. I get she's trying to do "authentic writing" exercises, but that kind of writing is the antithesis of authentic for me.
I didn't run today. I grade Rikki-tikki-tavi tests instead.
I had my brother over for dinner. He was an easy guest. Of course, I wasn't at my apartment when he got there. I was on a a beer walk (he once noted, "J, I'm not gay. I don't drink red wine or hot tea.") So, things didn't run smoothly, but that's part of the fun. Hospitality feels a lot like teaching in that respect. He said he liked the salmon casserole better than the Mexican one when he was prepared to enjoy the Mexican. I like how easy going he is-- I had chips and salsa out on the table then served yeast rolls. He didn't blink an eye. Then, "for entertainment", we went on a walk and swung on the elementary school swings and talked about life and jobs. I had a great time. Of course, he's had years of practice with my antics.
So, I borrowed "Love Walked In" by Marisa De Los Santos from the library because my sister said she could see me writing some of the sentences in it. That piqued my interest: what kind of sentences would I write? It looks like chit lit (bad); it's a NYT bestseller (less bad).
I've finished my homework for my Bible study, but haven't done the writing assigment for my Spanish class. I'm supposed to write a single's want ad peppered with reflexive verbs. If I do it, I'll just write random sentences with "me gusta" and "nos preocupa", etc. I get she's trying to do "authentic writing" exercises, but that kind of writing is the antithesis of authentic for me.
I didn't run today. I grade Rikki-tikki-tavi tests instead.
Monday, October 4, 2010
rikki tikki tavi
This weekend wandered through its alotted hours at a quick enjoyable pace. Sleep was my major accomplishment, looking upon it. I was exhausted and crabby Friday night, but by Sunday, I was back to amiable.
I went to the opening of the uptown Mint Museum of Art. It was fantastic-- they were open 24 hours for free. I took advantage of the tame, family-friendly hours. The art teacher from my school was there figure-drawing. I posed with the paid model for 15 minutes. It was a lot harder than it looks. But, the charcoal is now safely tucked under my bed. I haven't set it yet.
I had a lovely dinner with a dear friend and we aimed to discuss Eugene Peterson's Reversed Thunder. But, we didn't get past the introduction-- there was too many other things with which to chat-- from bangs to PhDs to genes. The food and company were incredibly enjoyable and edifying. Friends feel like home. I remember who I am outside of present circumstances when I'm with a true friend. CSL may be right when he calls friendship the highest love. Being around M always renews my appreciation and awe of the power of hospitality and food.
I was so inspired by M that on Sunday afternoon I spent two hours cooking. I made a salmon, spinach, sauteed mushroom, onion and garlic, corn, cream of mushroom and whole wheat rotini casserole. And a mexican one with brown rice, salsa, corn, chicken, onions, black beans and cheese. I froze the extra in zip lock bags-- I spread them out in a thin layer so it will be easy to thaw them. I felt very creative. Cooking makes me want to drink wine.
We're reading Rikki Tikki Tavi in class. It's a fun little ditty full of simile and metaphor, which is fun.
I went to the opening of the uptown Mint Museum of Art. It was fantastic-- they were open 24 hours for free. I took advantage of the tame, family-friendly hours. The art teacher from my school was there figure-drawing. I posed with the paid model for 15 minutes. It was a lot harder than it looks. But, the charcoal is now safely tucked under my bed. I haven't set it yet.
I had a lovely dinner with a dear friend and we aimed to discuss Eugene Peterson's Reversed Thunder. But, we didn't get past the introduction-- there was too many other things with which to chat-- from bangs to PhDs to genes. The food and company were incredibly enjoyable and edifying. Friends feel like home. I remember who I am outside of present circumstances when I'm with a true friend. CSL may be right when he calls friendship the highest love. Being around M always renews my appreciation and awe of the power of hospitality and food.
I was so inspired by M that on Sunday afternoon I spent two hours cooking. I made a salmon, spinach, sauteed mushroom, onion and garlic, corn, cream of mushroom and whole wheat rotini casserole. And a mexican one with brown rice, salsa, corn, chicken, onions, black beans and cheese. I froze the extra in zip lock bags-- I spread them out in a thin layer so it will be easy to thaw them. I felt very creative. Cooking makes me want to drink wine.
We're reading Rikki Tikki Tavi in class. It's a fun little ditty full of simile and metaphor, which is fun.
Monday, September 27, 2010
baby!!
M had her baby today at 2:15 am Pacific Time: Safiya Hope who is 9lbs and 20 inches. It sounds from the brief sketch that I got, that it was an incredibly rough labor-- 34 hours that ended in a C-section. But, Safiya looks like she's pretty sturdy from her stats. It was an incredibly rough pregnancy too. I'm happy for M that all the waiting is over and the real fun begins.
It's so odd to think that two Junes ago I met her bf now husband, I went to their wedding in October, and now they're parents to an incredibly beautiful tank. We serve an amazing God! Sometimes when I whine about the seeming monotony of my life, my sister points out that I have no clue where I'll be in a year (geographically, professionally, relationally)-- that monotony is an illusion. CS Lewis says that it is an illusion that Satan gives us to make us disgruntled and restless. However, M. is living proof you're future is an adventure.
My roommate from Regent is preggers and almost ready to give birth too. It's a baby saturated time. It's so odd to be in such a different place in my life. I'm really excited for them but feel alienated too because this experience is so far outside of mine. Plus, a date seems a reach right now let alone marriage and kids.
So in honor of all my friends' long, intense labors, I'm going to do a 24 hour adventure race with three Marines October 16th. It starts at 12 noon and ends at 12 noon. There's mountain biking, paddling, orienteering and trekking. You carry all of your gear. It's going to be all out insanity. I'm going to be the only girl. It's going to be miserable and awesome!!
It's so odd to think that two Junes ago I met her bf now husband, I went to their wedding in October, and now they're parents to an incredibly beautiful tank. We serve an amazing God! Sometimes when I whine about the seeming monotony of my life, my sister points out that I have no clue where I'll be in a year (geographically, professionally, relationally)-- that monotony is an illusion. CS Lewis says that it is an illusion that Satan gives us to make us disgruntled and restless. However, M. is living proof you're future is an adventure.
My roommate from Regent is preggers and almost ready to give birth too. It's a baby saturated time. It's so odd to be in such a different place in my life. I'm really excited for them but feel alienated too because this experience is so far outside of mine. Plus, a date seems a reach right now let alone marriage and kids.
So in honor of all my friends' long, intense labors, I'm going to do a 24 hour adventure race with three Marines October 16th. It starts at 12 noon and ends at 12 noon. There's mountain biking, paddling, orienteering and trekking. You carry all of your gear. It's going to be all out insanity. I'm going to be the only girl. It's going to be miserable and awesome!!
Friday, September 24, 2010
character vs. fate
I've been particularly inspired with my teaching as of late. I'm figuring out new ways to present ideas. For instance, I've been using images to teach vocabulary... and it works. All I have to say is "big eggplant shakes his finger at little eggplant" and my kids will say "admonish". And, I made 100-point font versions of the words and cut them out and color coded them for my kinesthetic (sp?) learners-- and they loved it. I've added this to the already popular "vocabulary charades"-- the kids ask to play it. I'm keen to see their test scores after this approach. When I do this kind of lesson, it's how I'd imagined teaching would be.
Today I decided to do visuals for my conflict presentation/ power point. I enjoyed it: the kids brought up interesting examples. And, it wasn't until I was drinking Pepsi and reading Mocking Bird at Ikea did one of my questions for my students hit me: "What are the types of conflict are in your life?" And, I realized so much of my angst is character vs. fate and character vs. self (i.e. internal). I rail against my life-- it's so not what I had in mind. And sometimes the dissonance between what I want and I what I have is suffocating. And, I don't know how to get to where I want... and sometimes I can't even name what I am pining after.
For instance, I'm Southern: I was born in the South to to Southerners. It doesn't get much more southern than that (each side is at least 4 generations back). Yet, as a friend observed, "You're the least southern Southerner I've ever met. I know transplants that are more southern than you." Then, last night I lifted my funk about (what feels like) my perpetual singleness by looking at pictures from various trips. It was a good reminder of some of the amazingness I've experienced that a lot of people will never experience. It eased the pain of not getting to experience a relationship. Travelling in Japan, Galapogos, Greece, Macchu Pichu isn't the same as having kids, but neither will they mutate into teenagers.
I think I need to come up with a schedule so that I stay busy with stuff that heads me in the direction that I want to go. Like tonight I should have studied and read instead of shopping without buying anything. I guess it was good encouragement to run since the pants were not a desirable fit and I didn't waste any money. But, otherwise, it was a waste of time. But, I need to focus on the positive.
Today I decided to do visuals for my conflict presentation/ power point. I enjoyed it: the kids brought up interesting examples. And, it wasn't until I was drinking Pepsi and reading Mocking Bird at Ikea did one of my questions for my students hit me: "What are the types of conflict are in your life?" And, I realized so much of my angst is character vs. fate and character vs. self (i.e. internal). I rail against my life-- it's so not what I had in mind. And sometimes the dissonance between what I want and I what I have is suffocating. And, I don't know how to get to where I want... and sometimes I can't even name what I am pining after.
For instance, I'm Southern: I was born in the South to to Southerners. It doesn't get much more southern than that (each side is at least 4 generations back). Yet, as a friend observed, "You're the least southern Southerner I've ever met. I know transplants that are more southern than you." Then, last night I lifted my funk about (what feels like) my perpetual singleness by looking at pictures from various trips. It was a good reminder of some of the amazingness I've experienced that a lot of people will never experience. It eased the pain of not getting to experience a relationship. Travelling in Japan, Galapogos, Greece, Macchu Pichu isn't the same as having kids, but neither will they mutate into teenagers.
I think I need to come up with a schedule so that I stay busy with stuff that heads me in the direction that I want to go. Like tonight I should have studied and read instead of shopping without buying anything. I guess it was good encouragement to run since the pants were not a desirable fit and I didn't waste any money. But, otherwise, it was a waste of time. But, I need to focus on the positive.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
tiger rising projects
My students turned in their TR projects today. Well, I should say they were due, and about two-thirds of my students brought their projects. I was appalled at the work... or lack thereof. Seriously? I gave three As and mostly Cs. There's a part of me that blanches at giving a kid an F-- but it would be an insult to the child and all things noble and good to attach any higher grade. No doubt I'm going to get a zillion complaints because interims go out Thursday (and my principal won't back me; she doesn't believe kids should fail-- even if they do absolutely jack). So be it. I can't teach that shoddy work is acceptable. I feel somehow responsible for what they turned in, and I don't know why. This was utterly depressing. Perhaps, I should have explained my expectations better.
I didn't get a run in, which I should have made a priority. I need to join the Y--it's too dark to run when I got home. But, I did work on my Genesis study. It was fun. K, my roommie, referred to me as a "life-long learner" with all my classes and books-- the library loves your type of person. So, when my sister called me a nerd tonight; I corrected her, "I'm a lifelong learner." She responded, "Goodnight, life-long nerd. Happy studying." And, this life-long learner needs a desk in her room, so she can nerd it up in private.
I'm contemplating a second job, but, perhaps, weaning my spending is a better idea. I need to think and pray on it. It'll cut in on my running and studying but will mean I can travel this summer. Perhaps, I can join a low time commitment ponzi scheme.
I didn't get a run in, which I should have made a priority. I need to join the Y--it's too dark to run when I got home. But, I did work on my Genesis study. It was fun. K, my roommie, referred to me as a "life-long learner" with all my classes and books-- the library loves your type of person. So, when my sister called me a nerd tonight; I corrected her, "I'm a lifelong learner." She responded, "Goodnight, life-long nerd. Happy studying." And, this life-long learner needs a desk in her room, so she can nerd it up in private.
I'm contemplating a second job, but, perhaps, weaning my spending is a better idea. I need to think and pray on it. It'll cut in on my running and studying but will mean I can travel this summer. Perhaps, I can join a low time commitment ponzi scheme.
Monday, September 20, 2010
a long time
Everyone needs a 5 month hiatus every now and again. Mine was put to good use: 3 weeks on the Vineyard, a month in Latin America (Peru (Macchu Pichu), Ecuador (Galapagos Islands)), a weekend get-away to Boston, and I moved about 20 miles in distance, but it feels a lot further.
Update:
- I'm taking Spanish lessons on Wednesdays. There are 3 students in my class; our teacher is from Columbia. I've been to one class, and I'm thinking Level 3 might be a little ambitious. But, it will be fun. Why my sudden interest in Espanol? Embarrassment when I was in Latin America-- everybody I met was multi-lingual except for other Americans. Next, I want to take Hebrew at the Jewish Center. But, I know my limitations... one language at a time.
- I'm loving my classes this year. Let me tell you: good students make all the difference! I actually am kind of excited to go into work. It's as the Chief says it's good to give and receive... you're getting fed too; it makes a difference. And, I am. My emotional climate classroom is much warmer this year. I have about ten readers-- it's so fun to talk books with them. Plus, it's freeing to know that I won't be back next year. I need to get on the process of getting a job lined up.
- Church. I feel hesitant to make the announcement, but I think I've found one. King of Kings Anglican church. The pastor is a Regent grad. It's a teaching church that's into being Jesus' hands and feet. The service had all three of my must-haves: Nicene Creed, Lord's Prayer and expository preaching (he just plowed on through Psalm 84). They're under the Rwandan bishop-- so their talk about the universal church is more than PC chatter. I saw a woman on Sunday that I met at Well of Mercy and was glad to see because she was incredibly interesting and funny. And, there's a women's Bible study on Genesis-- not weight loss or being a loving wife. I'm a fan of the single-sex without the cloyingly sweet subject material. I'm so not a knitter. (This has made me a little giddy. I had no idea how much it had been weighing on me. My ever-pragmatic sister warned me that it won't be perfect because a church is a bunch of people.)
- I moved. I like my cute, little, old apartment. I think my roommate and I will work well together. I love the running-- the neighborhoods are great with huge trees, and there are parks. It's fantastic! And, I can walk to lots of little independent restaurants and an independent theater. It feels like I live in a city. The apartment is tiny, but I'm referring to it as "European" and seeing it as a growth opportunity. I'm way to American with all the crap I have. I need to pare down. Although 100 things is not a realistic goal at this time, I think I can definitely streamline my stuff and work on my attitude and relationship to buying and owning.
I hope to be more frequent. It dawned on me as I started treating my FB status as self-expression that I needed to get back to blogging! Although I terminated all my readership through the hiatus, I'm back! I'm reading Peterson's Reversed Thunder and Collins' Mockingjay. So, I'll report on that and other belly-button flint as I see fit.
Quotation: "Life is too short to be small." Disraeli
Update:
- I'm taking Spanish lessons on Wednesdays. There are 3 students in my class; our teacher is from Columbia. I've been to one class, and I'm thinking Level 3 might be a little ambitious. But, it will be fun. Why my sudden interest in Espanol? Embarrassment when I was in Latin America-- everybody I met was multi-lingual except for other Americans. Next, I want to take Hebrew at the Jewish Center. But, I know my limitations... one language at a time.
- I'm loving my classes this year. Let me tell you: good students make all the difference! I actually am kind of excited to go into work. It's as the Chief says it's good to give and receive... you're getting fed too; it makes a difference. And, I am. My emotional climate classroom is much warmer this year. I have about ten readers-- it's so fun to talk books with them. Plus, it's freeing to know that I won't be back next year. I need to get on the process of getting a job lined up.
- Church. I feel hesitant to make the announcement, but I think I've found one. King of Kings Anglican church. The pastor is a Regent grad. It's a teaching church that's into being Jesus' hands and feet. The service had all three of my must-haves: Nicene Creed, Lord's Prayer and expository preaching (he just plowed on through Psalm 84). They're under the Rwandan bishop-- so their talk about the universal church is more than PC chatter. I saw a woman on Sunday that I met at Well of Mercy and was glad to see because she was incredibly interesting and funny. And, there's a women's Bible study on Genesis-- not weight loss or being a loving wife. I'm a fan of the single-sex without the cloyingly sweet subject material. I'm so not a knitter. (This has made me a little giddy. I had no idea how much it had been weighing on me. My ever-pragmatic sister warned me that it won't be perfect because a church is a bunch of people.)
- I moved. I like my cute, little, old apartment. I think my roommate and I will work well together. I love the running-- the neighborhoods are great with huge trees, and there are parks. It's fantastic! And, I can walk to lots of little independent restaurants and an independent theater. It feels like I live in a city. The apartment is tiny, but I'm referring to it as "European" and seeing it as a growth opportunity. I'm way to American with all the crap I have. I need to pare down. Although 100 things is not a realistic goal at this time, I think I can definitely streamline my stuff and work on my attitude and relationship to buying and owning.
I hope to be more frequent. It dawned on me as I started treating my FB status as self-expression that I needed to get back to blogging! Although I terminated all my readership through the hiatus, I'm back! I'm reading Peterson's Reversed Thunder and Collins' Mockingjay. So, I'll report on that and other belly-button flint as I see fit.
Quotation: "Life is too short to be small." Disraeli
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
acceptance and enjoyment
I feel often I misconstrue openess and acceptance for resignation and failure. It's hard to enjoy something that you feel resigned to doing. And, and I've been fighting resignation is where I've been in my life recently. I feel if I relax into my job and life that it will somehow leech my spirit and future. But, I that's hogwash. As several of my friends point out on an annoyingly frequent nature, I'm in a season.
Today, as I walked down the eigth grade hall, I thought about how different it would look if I knew this was my last year being here. I'd find all the idiosyncracies quaint instead of annoying.
And, today I was really enjoying teaching poetry. It's fun. About half of each of my classes was getting into it too. I tried to bribe and/or ignore the other half. And, several of my students just came up and hugged me. L told me that my outfit was much better today, and that I shouldn't wear heels if I didn't like them. And, a student from last year came and hung out with me after school-- she told me how much I helped her. And, about eight kids stayed around to chat.
Now, I'm off to watch the soccer and baseball games. I have students playing in both. I just got finished helping the art teacher contour draw some of the sections of the mural. Today was a lovely day except for evil secretary yelling at me for something she screwed up. But, the good far outweighed the bad.
This is enjoyment and acceptance not resignation... I think. When I came back from helping with the mural, I had an email from a school I've sent an application. So, this may be my last year.
Today, as I walked down the eigth grade hall, I thought about how different it would look if I knew this was my last year being here. I'd find all the idiosyncracies quaint instead of annoying.
And, today I was really enjoying teaching poetry. It's fun. About half of each of my classes was getting into it too. I tried to bribe and/or ignore the other half. And, several of my students just came up and hugged me. L told me that my outfit was much better today, and that I shouldn't wear heels if I didn't like them. And, a student from last year came and hung out with me after school-- she told me how much I helped her. And, about eight kids stayed around to chat.
Now, I'm off to watch the soccer and baseball games. I have students playing in both. I just got finished helping the art teacher contour draw some of the sections of the mural. Today was a lovely day except for evil secretary yelling at me for something she screwed up. But, the good far outweighed the bad.
This is enjoyment and acceptance not resignation... I think. When I came back from helping with the mural, I had an email from a school I've sent an application. So, this may be my last year.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
lessons
The weather is cooperating with my spring break. It's absolutely gorgeous, and I'm sunburned. I'm in Richmond, VA, staying with my sister. I've been doing a lot of running and walking in the historic parts. This morning I wandered around Hollywood Cemetary where three presidents and Jefferson Davis are burried. It's enjoyable to be outside just sitting or standing.
I got a Blackberry on Saturday because my brother broke his phone. There was a buy one get one free deal. Yep. I walked into that one. I can see why they're referred to as crackberries. It's hypnotic all the updates you get. And, I like word mole... a lot. My highest score thus far is 57 with "squirrel". And, I'm trying to find a free, easy to use budget application to use on my phone.
I am supposed to hear from the National Writing Project by the end of this week. I'm nervous and excited. I'm reminding myself that it'll be expensive and a pain in the butt-- so it's not all bad if I don't get accepted. But, it will be awesome.
I learned again how poor I am during a conversation with the CPA who does my taxes. Yowsers, I was going to buy a new laptop, a sewing machine, put an extra thousand towards my student loan and the rest in savings. I'm hilarious with a great imagination. I'll get a lesser version of the laptop I want if I getting into the summer institute and I'm looking for a used sewing machine.
So, I learned the difference between a "deduction" and a "credit" are from said CPA-- that's part of the problem. I thought the interest on student loans functioned as a credit-- nope, it's a deduction.
I really need another job. My position is changing a lot with the smaller budget. It'll take a lot of time but without any worthy gains. I don't want to do it.
I'm trying to introspect, but it's hard to unwind enough to get to the good stuff.
Waiting is a difficult task. It requires a lot of faith and hope in God's goodness and power... and observational skills. I'm concerned He's taking me in a different direction than I'm interested in going. This poverty thinking stinks. But, maintaining an eternal perspective in near impossible-- that's where the Bible and prayer come into play, I presume.
My sister has a lot of fantastic cook books. She's been calling me "the monk" as I copy her recipes ino my recipe book.
I got a Blackberry on Saturday because my brother broke his phone. There was a buy one get one free deal. Yep. I walked into that one. I can see why they're referred to as crackberries. It's hypnotic all the updates you get. And, I like word mole... a lot. My highest score thus far is 57 with "squirrel". And, I'm trying to find a free, easy to use budget application to use on my phone.
I am supposed to hear from the National Writing Project by the end of this week. I'm nervous and excited. I'm reminding myself that it'll be expensive and a pain in the butt-- so it's not all bad if I don't get accepted. But, it will be awesome.
I learned again how poor I am during a conversation with the CPA who does my taxes. Yowsers, I was going to buy a new laptop, a sewing machine, put an extra thousand towards my student loan and the rest in savings. I'm hilarious with a great imagination. I'll get a lesser version of the laptop I want if I getting into the summer institute and I'm looking for a used sewing machine.
So, I learned the difference between a "deduction" and a "credit" are from said CPA-- that's part of the problem. I thought the interest on student loans functioned as a credit-- nope, it's a deduction.
I really need another job. My position is changing a lot with the smaller budget. It'll take a lot of time but without any worthy gains. I don't want to do it.
I'm trying to introspect, but it's hard to unwind enough to get to the good stuff.
Waiting is a difficult task. It requires a lot of faith and hope in God's goodness and power... and observational skills. I'm concerned He's taking me in a different direction than I'm interested in going. This poverty thinking stinks. But, maintaining an eternal perspective in near impossible-- that's where the Bible and prayer come into play, I presume.
My sister has a lot of fantastic cook books. She's been calling me "the monk" as I copy her recipes ino my recipe book.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
prep for spring break
It's surreal that we've made it to Spring Break. I just printed up my grades to sign and hand in to the secretary.
Now I'm off to a 30 minute abs class. I'm not sure my abs are up for 30 minutes of anything, esp. working. We'll see. It's my friends birthday and this is what she wanted to do.
And, I signed up for two 10ks. One is next Saturday-- it's a road race. One is May 22-- it's a trail run at the National Whitewater center. I think I'm ready for 10ks but not quite there for halfs.
Found some awesome vegan recipes. Citrus Basil Lentils.
Heading up to Richmond tomorrow.
Now I'm off to a 30 minute abs class. I'm not sure my abs are up for 30 minutes of anything, esp. working. We'll see. It's my friends birthday and this is what she wanted to do.
And, I signed up for two 10ks. One is next Saturday-- it's a road race. One is May 22-- it's a trail run at the National Whitewater center. I think I'm ready for 10ks but not quite there for halfs.
Found some awesome vegan recipes. Citrus Basil Lentils.
Heading up to Richmond tomorrow.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
computer hospice
My five year-old computer is shuddering through her last breaths. So, sorry for the absence of posts. Plus, the janitor was locking up the school at 4:30 instead of 5:30-- so there went another opportunity.
But, the weather is gorgeous. It's in the best and most fleeting part of spring. It's that two-three week window of flowers and the lively, new green and perfect temperature. It's glorious to walk outside-- everything around you is magical. It's like being in a fairytale. Finding a little fairy perched on a toadstool wouldn't feel that uncanny right now. Or a little gnome digging in the dirt.
Yesterday, the 7th grade went to Old Salem in Winston-Salem, NC. It was a fantastic field trip-- my only regret was that we didn't stay longer. I was in charge of 9 students who behaved beautifully. I took all the brats because I wasn't going to dump them on the parent volunteers. So, I was dreading it a little. But, the kids were fascinated with all the tours and guns and ideas. I bought them hot cross buns and we chatted about Easter symbolism and moravian baking. I think it helped that I thouroughly enjoyed myself-- it's a good reminder. Kids are like horses; they smell emotion.
Then last night after attending to business (faxing and mailing applications), I went to my new favorite restaurant and had a portabello sandwich and went to a GK Chesterton lecture. The lecture was phenomenal. A professor dressed up as GK Chesterton and gave the lecture from his perspective. It was delightful and thought-provoking. Chesterton was such a witty guy that it was a brilliant idea. Then, this morning after pilates, my book club discussed his Orthodoxy-- how providential was that?
One more week of Lent to go! I'm ready for some meat and bread. I've lost about ten pounds and feeling really good. It's been a really good experience and reminder.
After much angst, I've decided to attend one of the thirty singles sunday school class. For some reason, this has been a really tough decision. Clearly, it represents a lot of unresolved issues in my psyche and heart. It feels like admitting defeat-- a lot like resignation. Plus, I get fairly annoyed in these kinds of set ups; a down side of studying theology. But, clearly, I need something if I went through so much angst. I'm just so completely opposed to categorizing.
I'm applying to some jobs and programs. I hate waiting.
But, the weather is gorgeous. It's in the best and most fleeting part of spring. It's that two-three week window of flowers and the lively, new green and perfect temperature. It's glorious to walk outside-- everything around you is magical. It's like being in a fairytale. Finding a little fairy perched on a toadstool wouldn't feel that uncanny right now. Or a little gnome digging in the dirt.
Yesterday, the 7th grade went to Old Salem in Winston-Salem, NC. It was a fantastic field trip-- my only regret was that we didn't stay longer. I was in charge of 9 students who behaved beautifully. I took all the brats because I wasn't going to dump them on the parent volunteers. So, I was dreading it a little. But, the kids were fascinated with all the tours and guns and ideas. I bought them hot cross buns and we chatted about Easter symbolism and moravian baking. I think it helped that I thouroughly enjoyed myself-- it's a good reminder. Kids are like horses; they smell emotion.
Then last night after attending to business (faxing and mailing applications), I went to my new favorite restaurant and had a portabello sandwich and went to a GK Chesterton lecture. The lecture was phenomenal. A professor dressed up as GK Chesterton and gave the lecture from his perspective. It was delightful and thought-provoking. Chesterton was such a witty guy that it was a brilliant idea. Then, this morning after pilates, my book club discussed his Orthodoxy-- how providential was that?
One more week of Lent to go! I'm ready for some meat and bread. I've lost about ten pounds and feeling really good. It's been a really good experience and reminder.
After much angst, I've decided to attend one of the thirty singles sunday school class. For some reason, this has been a really tough decision. Clearly, it represents a lot of unresolved issues in my psyche and heart. It feels like admitting defeat-- a lot like resignation. Plus, I get fairly annoyed in these kinds of set ups; a down side of studying theology. But, clearly, I need something if I went through so much angst. I'm just so completely opposed to categorizing.
I'm applying to some jobs and programs. I hate waiting.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
bronchitis
A bad bout of bronchitis is making me feel like death... and sound like it too. I went to the doctor and got meds. So, I should be on the mend. Apparently, my sicknesses are related to allergies... and everything is in bloom. It's glorious outside. Perfect.
The conference was inspiring. It reminded me there is a point to teaching... beyond the paperwork, annoying parents and lack of supplies.
I was at school one, whopping day this week. Yea, spring break... well conference and death by bronchitis.
I bought some really fun fabric today (I can see my sister rolling her eyes now). I am checking Consumer Reports on sewing machines.
The conference was inspiring. It reminded me there is a point to teaching... beyond the paperwork, annoying parents and lack of supplies.
I was at school one, whopping day this week. Yea, spring break... well conference and death by bronchitis.
I bought some really fun fabric today (I can see my sister rolling her eyes now). I am checking Consumer Reports on sewing machines.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
weird day
I stayed out of school. I slept a lot, talked on the phone and watched The Gospel of John (the three hour version). I did put potting soil into some pots but no seeds. I did unload the rest of the dishwasher. Then, I was pooped. I'm waiting to feel normal. My aunt with a brain anuerism (sp?) reminded me how great normal is. I just wrote a really bizarre email to a school requesting an application. We'll see how that goes. And, I talked with a friend about his book proposal, which didn't feel like it went well. But, then, I get a text to stop what I'm working on because he's revamping it. So, maybe, it didn't go that badly. I'm headed home to the humidifier and nasal spray.
Monday, March 8, 2010
infected sinuses/sini/sinus
Yep. I'm sick. I have antibiotics to prove it. I felt like an idiot at the doctors-- I would have sworn I had strep throat. Good thing, I don't have money to place high stake bets. I've been feeling cruddy since Tuesday of last week. I left a half day to see a doctor today. I'm more relieved to find out what it is. As I drove to Charlotte, my strep throat was mutating into cancer. So, good to have professionals negate my imagination. I've deemed tomorrow a sick day too. Then, it's back to the proverbial grind.
Looking for work. Trying to be smart and methodical. Such things come hard for me. I found the article in The Atlantic both depressing and cathartic. But, I'm finding hope and encouragement in the Gospel of John, GK Chesterton's Orthodoxy and Books and Culture. God is at work... in the world, including my life. And, let's face it, there's lots of room for improvement. God, the sky's the limit.
Going home to sleep and heal.
Looking for work. Trying to be smart and methodical. Such things come hard for me. I found the article in The Atlantic both depressing and cathartic. But, I'm finding hope and encouragement in the Gospel of John, GK Chesterton's Orthodoxy and Books and Culture. God is at work... in the world, including my life. And, let's face it, there's lots of room for improvement. God, the sky's the limit.
Going home to sleep and heal.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
letdown
I was so sure we were going to get a snow day... or at least a two-hour delay. Nothing. I was miffed this morning (and still am a little... can you tell?) But, I got an excellent workout out of my self-generated hype as I mentioned before.
The Chief has been sick, and I've been cranky with her. It's just that all her drama and loud breathing are getting to me. And, she sends me out multiple times to get a single item. I told her last night before I went on a hamburger mission-- Is there anything else? Then I listed about twenty things I thought she might want or need. She wanted rainbow sherbert to soothe her throat. So, I saved myself an extra trip.
I'm going to skip my writing class because I think I'm coming down with what the Chief has. Dayquil can only stave it off for so long.
My students were far better behaved today. I can't pinpoint what was different: it has to be a mixture of them and me. But, I didn't argue-- instead, I was a broken record, which is far more effective with this age group.
As for the Daniel Fast, 2 of 6 weeks have been completed. I've lost 8.2 lbs. I'm praying more regularly-- I've set aside ten minutes of my commute each way, and inevitably I pray more or get side tracked. And, I'm more in tune/aware of my physical, mental and spiritual goings on. It's not as if I've stopped sinning or become holy, but it's as if I can see sin for what it is. How I'm eating is affecting how I'm sleeping, my running, my energy level (all for the better). I'm feeling how integrated my body is. Although I had a really emotionally rough night last night-- overall, life feels more manageable. Perhaps, it's because of the discipline being applied in one area.
Anyway, I'm a big fan of this fast.
The Chief has been sick, and I've been cranky with her. It's just that all her drama and loud breathing are getting to me. And, she sends me out multiple times to get a single item. I told her last night before I went on a hamburger mission-- Is there anything else? Then I listed about twenty things I thought she might want or need. She wanted rainbow sherbert to soothe her throat. So, I saved myself an extra trip.
I'm going to skip my writing class because I think I'm coming down with what the Chief has. Dayquil can only stave it off for so long.
My students were far better behaved today. I can't pinpoint what was different: it has to be a mixture of them and me. But, I didn't argue-- instead, I was a broken record, which is far more effective with this age group.
As for the Daniel Fast, 2 of 6 weeks have been completed. I've lost 8.2 lbs. I'm praying more regularly-- I've set aside ten minutes of my commute each way, and inevitably I pray more or get side tracked. And, I'm more in tune/aware of my physical, mental and spiritual goings on. It's not as if I've stopped sinning or become holy, but it's as if I can see sin for what it is. How I'm eating is affecting how I'm sleeping, my running, my energy level (all for the better). I'm feeling how integrated my body is. Although I had a really emotionally rough night last night-- overall, life feels more manageable. Perhaps, it's because of the discipline being applied in one area.
Anyway, I'm a big fan of this fast.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
snow 1.5 hours?
Forget a snow day. Our school system let out one hour forty minutes early. Okay, whatever. Class was kind of pointless for the most part-- the kids were all high on snow... and getting out of school. So, I left school at 2:35, went to the Y, ran 6.5 miles on a treadmill, then aced a piyo class. It was my best yoga class ever because I was warmed up after just having run an hour. Of course, everybody looked cute and all yoga chic, and I was wet with sweat in my old running gear.
I really want a snow day tomorrow. So, I'm at the library checking out KL Going's Saint Iggy and the 2010 Newberry Winner When you reach me by stead. Snow day. The sky has been dropping these huge, luscious snow flakes. However, said snowflakes melt as soon as they touch the ground. I hope it gets cold tonight.
I really want a snow day tomorrow. So, I'm at the library checking out KL Going's Saint Iggy and the 2010 Newberry Winner When you reach me by stead. Snow day. The sky has been dropping these huge, luscious snow flakes. However, said snowflakes melt as soon as they touch the ground. I hope it gets cold tonight.
biz E
*Busyness and no internet at home are my only excuses. Sorry. I didn't even make my self-imposed quota for February. C'est la vie.
*Career Day went well, leaving me very pleased. My cousin's law school friend had an interesting presentation with pictures he'd used in court, but he had an even cooler message of dedication and persistence.
*The custodian has given me a deadline to get out of the building: 5:30. It seems reasonable, but when you have a bunch of parent conferences and a bunch of work to be done on the computer and things to run off. It gets dicey.
*So, some people are calling for snow, and some people are calling for cold rain. I want snow, but the rain people have a stronger argument. All shall be revealed by 6am tomorrow.
*I went to a Yoga class last night-- my first since college. It wasn't that scary; there were other yoga-phonies in there like I am-- they had on lacrosse t-shirts. But, I am sore: there's some funky bending and lifting going on.
*I now must put a hotel on my credit card for the middle school conference and get my stuff ready to start the novel.
*Lent is going well except I inadvertently ate some cheese in a vegetarian lasagna. I just wasn't thinking.
*Career Day went well, leaving me very pleased. My cousin's law school friend had an interesting presentation with pictures he'd used in court, but he had an even cooler message of dedication and persistence.
*The custodian has given me a deadline to get out of the building: 5:30. It seems reasonable, but when you have a bunch of parent conferences and a bunch of work to be done on the computer and things to run off. It gets dicey.
*So, some people are calling for snow, and some people are calling for cold rain. I want snow, but the rain people have a stronger argument. All shall be revealed by 6am tomorrow.
*I went to a Yoga class last night-- my first since college. It wasn't that scary; there were other yoga-phonies in there like I am-- they had on lacrosse t-shirts. But, I am sore: there's some funky bending and lifting going on.
*I now must put a hotel on my credit card for the middle school conference and get my stuff ready to start the novel.
*Lent is going well except I inadvertently ate some cheese in a vegetarian lasagna. I just wasn't thinking.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
what do it matter?
Work was rough, r-u-f-f, today. I considered screaming (and probably did raise my voice) during some more ridiculous meetings. And, the seventh graders were being, well, seventh graders. I commanded, "Get back to your seat!" And the response was, "But, I was only a couple of steps away from it." (It's in line with my favorite: "I wasn't talking-- I was asking a question!") And, I put grades into the system for over an hour. Why am I teacher?
But, several of my boys got really into Anne McCaffrey's "Smallest Dragonboy" as did I. It's a really good story and it's part of a trilogy. So, two of them went to the library to get copies. That's rewarding.
And, I had a lovely run. It was about 3.5 miles and on the slowish side. But, very relaxing and the temperature was not too hot and not too cold.
Plus, I got my first tangible reward (besides comments) from this stinking blog. A book... how apropos. The publishers sent me "What Do It Matter?" by the guys who wrote "Same Kind of Different As Me". I'm looking forward to reading it after my weird little sci-fi.
I still haven't written my article for my class tomorrow. And, I don't want to, and I'm tempted to drop out of the class. But, I spent over one hundred dollars on it. So, I might as well go even if I don't have my homework. It's supposed to be fun not to stress me out. And, Career Day's the following day and I need to prep for myself and two other guys plus look nice.
I still haven't applied to any new jobs. It's hard not having internet access on my personal computer. (I'm at the library now.) And, reading the article in the Atlantic about the job landscape wasn't exactly encouraging. And, is teaching even a good fit? Or, will I find any job incredibly stressful being a stressball and all?
Writing all this down puts into rather harsh (and hilarious) perspective. Ah, running and writing and reading-- God's gifts to my curmudgeonly (sp?) soul. Lent isn't feeling overly spiritual, but I am praying more. And, I'm realizing what a stress eater I am. Yowsers, a couple of times this week, I'd gladly demolished a coke and a candy bar and had to settle for raw almonds or a cup of pineapple.
But, several of my boys got really into Anne McCaffrey's "Smallest Dragonboy" as did I. It's a really good story and it's part of a trilogy. So, two of them went to the library to get copies. That's rewarding.
And, I had a lovely run. It was about 3.5 miles and on the slowish side. But, very relaxing and the temperature was not too hot and not too cold.
Plus, I got my first tangible reward (besides comments) from this stinking blog. A book... how apropos. The publishers sent me "What Do It Matter?" by the guys who wrote "Same Kind of Different As Me". I'm looking forward to reading it after my weird little sci-fi.
I still haven't written my article for my class tomorrow. And, I don't want to, and I'm tempted to drop out of the class. But, I spent over one hundred dollars on it. So, I might as well go even if I don't have my homework. It's supposed to be fun not to stress me out. And, Career Day's the following day and I need to prep for myself and two other guys plus look nice.
I still haven't applied to any new jobs. It's hard not having internet access on my personal computer. (I'm at the library now.) And, reading the article in the Atlantic about the job landscape wasn't exactly encouraging. And, is teaching even a good fit? Or, will I find any job incredibly stressful being a stressball and all?
Writing all this down puts into rather harsh (and hilarious) perspective. Ah, running and writing and reading-- God's gifts to my curmudgeonly (sp?) soul. Lent isn't feeling overly spiritual, but I am praying more. And, I'm realizing what a stress eater I am. Yowsers, a couple of times this week, I'd gladly demolished a coke and a candy bar and had to settle for raw almonds or a cup of pineapple.
Monday, February 22, 2010
weather report
It's a gloomy, wet, gray day-- perfect napping weather. I did yawn several times in my classes. And, I had TWO unexpected parent conferences-- we're talking about two hours of yakking about kids. One of them might prove worthwhile.
I had a beautiful, enjoyable, semi-productive weekend. I went for a run yesterday which was nice, but could tell that my caloric intake is down. And church was good although I find it irritating-- it's probably a reason I need to go. My church just makes me angry on several different levels. I have to pray myself through the services: exploration (what and why am I feeling this emotion) and confession (so often it's self-centeredness and pride and other types of my favorite sins).
The food aspect is going remarkably well. My appetite is definitely suppressed-- I'm eating when I'm not hungry to insure that my caloric intake is high enough. The Chief surmised that it's eliminating high corn fructose or whatever from my diet, which never lets you feel satiated. I feel better overall. But, the spiritual is still difficult. I'm praying more and reading my Bible. But, the journaling just isn't happening.
I found more schools to apply to. I'm going to do that and swim tonight.
I had a beautiful, enjoyable, semi-productive weekend. I went for a run yesterday which was nice, but could tell that my caloric intake is down. And church was good although I find it irritating-- it's probably a reason I need to go. My church just makes me angry on several different levels. I have to pray myself through the services: exploration (what and why am I feeling this emotion) and confession (so often it's self-centeredness and pride and other types of my favorite sins).
The food aspect is going remarkably well. My appetite is definitely suppressed-- I'm eating when I'm not hungry to insure that my caloric intake is high enough. The Chief surmised that it's eliminating high corn fructose or whatever from my diet, which never lets you feel satiated. I feel better overall. But, the spiritual is still difficult. I'm praying more and reading my Bible. But, the journaling just isn't happening.
I found more schools to apply to. I'm going to do that and swim tonight.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
day 4
It's the fourth day of Lent. No more headaches!! The Daniel Fast is going very well food-wise, but I'm struggling with the spiritual aspects: journaling, meditating, etc. This I hadn't expected. But, vegan isn't so bad. I'm not eating as much because a lot of my options no longer exist. And, I met my aunt for dinner last night at a place that had a vegan section of the menu. Sweet.
It was bizarre Friday afternoon knowing that I couldn't have a soda and candy bar as a reward to surviving my first day of centers. Same with looking at amazing desserts. Right now, it's not tempting to me. It's off limits. It feels like crushes that I had in school-- the boy was so unattainable it didn't really matter.
Today I did some yoga to relieve my aching neck and shoulders-- and it worked. Then, I went to bookclub to discuss Strout's Abide with Me, which two of the three of us weren't into. So, the discussion was good but just not about the book. But, I love chatting with the women. We decided on Chesterton's Orthodoxy for next month. Now, that's a book that excites me.
Then, K and I hiked Pinnacle Mtn. the shorter, steeper trail at Crowder's Mountain. It's in the 60s-- it was so lovely and crowded. Now, I need to go home and clean, write my feature article, organize my schedule for next week (study, work, class, apply to jobs, workout, plan food), laundry, eat. Then, I'll read or watch a movie!
It was bizarre Friday afternoon knowing that I couldn't have a soda and candy bar as a reward to surviving my first day of centers. Same with looking at amazing desserts. Right now, it's not tempting to me. It's off limits. It feels like crushes that I had in school-- the boy was so unattainable it didn't really matter.
Today I did some yoga to relieve my aching neck and shoulders-- and it worked. Then, I went to bookclub to discuss Strout's Abide with Me, which two of the three of us weren't into. So, the discussion was good but just not about the book. But, I love chatting with the women. We decided on Chesterton's Orthodoxy for next month. Now, that's a book that excites me.
Then, K and I hiked Pinnacle Mtn. the shorter, steeper trail at Crowder's Mountain. It's in the 60s-- it was so lovely and crowded. Now, I need to go home and clean, write my feature article, organize my schedule for next week (study, work, class, apply to jobs, workout, plan food), laundry, eat. Then, I'll read or watch a movie!
Thursday, February 18, 2010
lent confession
Yesterday my sister and I embarked on a rather ambitious Lent. We're doing the Daniel Fast for all of Lent. The Daniel Fast is basically a Vegan diet minus leavened bread, sugar and caffiene. I went home from school with a migraine yesterday afternoon and slept from 5-8pm then went back to bed from 10-6am. As inauspicious beginning as it might seem, I'm actually kind of excited. Whenever I've been on retreat sleep is a really big factor, especially at the beginning. So, although I slept through the Ash Wednesday service and haven't felt particularly soulful-- I'm still hopeful. This kind of thing is about faith afterall. I've picked the two areas of my life I'm praying into and about. I also know the people I'm praying for.
Now, I have a medium-sized headache. I'm introducing my centers tomorrow in class. It should be a little fun and crazy.
Now, I have a medium-sized headache. I'm introducing my centers tomorrow in class. It should be a little fun and crazy.
Monday, February 15, 2010
get-away
I went to Richmond this weekend. I took a sick day on Friday and scooted on up 85 and 95. I had a fantastic time with my sister! We had a very girlie, very foodie kind of a weekend. I felt very pampered. We're talking mani/pedi and facial, Valentine's Day the movie, Red's, Cafe Guttenberg, Millie's, Red Robbin and the gyro place. It was fun and relaxing. I'm tired but revived. I'm going to stay late at school tonight to work on my centers, which debut on Friday. I've got to get them organized.
And, my sister and I've have decided on a massive undertaking for Lent. We're going to do the Daniel Fast (vegan, no caffeine, no alcohol, no fried, no added sweeteners)for Lent, we're going to read two books of the Bible and journal. It's hard core, but it's really the only way. I've been getting less these couple of months both with food and reading my Bible. My body, heart and mind need to detox. Lent is a structured time with a great celebration at the end. What's not to like? I'm going to be in pain starting Wednesday. No caffiene.
I found two running clubs: one meets on M/W/F at 5:45am at the Country Club-- about a five minute jog from my house. And the other, meets Mondays at 7:15 and Thursdays at 6:30 pm at an elementary school. I'm a little concerned about the earliness, but it does appeal. And, I imagine the morning people are a little more hard core. Any opinions/insights?
I haven't heard anything from any jobs. We shall see.
And, my sister and I've have decided on a massive undertaking for Lent. We're going to do the Daniel Fast (vegan, no caffeine, no alcohol, no fried, no added sweeteners)for Lent, we're going to read two books of the Bible and journal. It's hard core, but it's really the only way. I've been getting less these couple of months both with food and reading my Bible. My body, heart and mind need to detox. Lent is a structured time with a great celebration at the end. What's not to like? I'm going to be in pain starting Wednesday. No caffiene.
I found two running clubs: one meets on M/W/F at 5:45am at the Country Club-- about a five minute jog from my house. And the other, meets Mondays at 7:15 and Thursdays at 6:30 pm at an elementary school. I'm a little concerned about the earliness, but it does appeal. And, I imagine the morning people are a little more hard core. Any opinions/insights?
I haven't heard anything from any jobs. We shall see.
President's Day
During homeroom last Thursday, we discussed what we were going to wear for Valentine's. Red is the right answer in case you were wondering... pink and purple not so much.
So, I quickly steered the conversation to President's Day. I asked them, "What President are you going to dress up as for President's Day?" I got a lot of Lincolns and Washingtons of course, but my favorite response was Benjamin Franklin. I told the kid, "Franklin wasn't a president." He looked at me indignantly and said, "He's on a hundred dollar bill." Which was fairly solid logic. But, we cleared up that misunderstanding.
So, I quickly steered the conversation to President's Day. I asked them, "What President are you going to dress up as for President's Day?" I got a lot of Lincolns and Washingtons of course, but my favorite response was Benjamin Franklin. I told the kid, "Franklin wasn't a president." He looked at me indignantly and said, "He's on a hundred dollar bill." Which was fairly solid logic. But, we cleared up that misunderstanding.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
faculty meeting
I loathe faculty meetings. I noticed that both my team members were absent as were the other 7th grade LA teachers. I felt abandoned... and stupid. Shocking, it was a colossal waste of time. But all was not in vain, there were two classic quotations from our erudite learning coach: 1) "the great autonomy of it all" and 2) "making connections with yourself".
honesty
When I went to pick up my class in the gym this morning, one of my students came up to me with three pips surrounding her. She says, "Hi, Ms. M. Not to be rude, but that is seriously the worst outfit you've worn all year." So, I've been a little self-conscious all day, but she did have a point. It's kind of out there.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
even distribution
Whenever there's a discussion about class makeup, the administration says it's random. However, the fact that two of our kids in the past two weeks have been charged with criminal activity, one attempted suicide and our scores at the beginning of the year were 20 points below the school average leads me to believe otherwise. Clearly, my team has been dumped on; and there are days that if I get any teaching done, I'm lucky. I try not to get upset, but look at it as both a mission ground and incentive to apply to other schools and school systems.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
the year of git 'er done (get her done)
I'm realizing a month and a half into 2010 that this is the year of rainmaking. I'm being very "pro-active"-- as opposed to "reactive". I've started multiple balls rolling. I envision myself keeping about 4 bowling lanes busy. It's hard work, but I'll get more strikes that way. I realize that in order to get the hotdog on my plate, I'm going to have to fork it and place it on the bun myself (it's a family story involving my brother and uncle). In honor of this insight, I've been sending out resumes and cover letters to schools I want to teach at in lieu of waiting to call me. I've been researching summer adventures, jobs, and schools. It takes a lot of faith and chutzpah because I hate rejection... and there is going to be a lot of impossible going on here. But, I feel I'm gaining a clearer vision of who I am and what I want to do. For instance, I'm taking the writing class, which I'm afraid is a bust, but I'm learning a lot about my hangups about writing and places I really need to grow. The class is helping me realize why my stuff isn't sellable as is. And, I tried a new church this morning instead of settling for the one I've been going to. And, I called a friend when I was feeling lonely, and we went for a lovely, long walk and chatted Calvin, Luther and theology. My life is still full of challenges, but I'm feeling less the victim with these crazy moves. Even with the diastrous romantic experiment of New Year's, I still learned a lot.
Also, the year of git 'er done has made me repeat and use my mom's mantra: "Sometimes, good enough is good enough." The centers aren't perfect, but, regardless, I'm starting them up in two weeks from Friday. I'm going to Richmond next weekend even though it's not a long weekend and I have a ton of work to do (and I'll have fun). I realize I spend way too much time waiting for the ideal, and it's simply not going to happen in this life.
Also, the year of git 'er done has made me repeat and use my mom's mantra: "Sometimes, good enough is good enough." The centers aren't perfect, but, regardless, I'm starting them up in two weeks from Friday. I'm going to Richmond next weekend even though it's not a long weekend and I have a ton of work to do (and I'll have fun). I realize I spend way too much time waiting for the ideal, and it's simply not going to happen in this life.
Friday, February 5, 2010
a bust
I had my first drug bust as a teacher yesterday. One of my students, C, got back from a 10-day suspension on Wednesday after the snow days. He was well-rested and raring to go. He was fine on Wednesday; well, he didn't open a book in my class, but he didn't kick anyone or anything. But, come Thursday morning, the School Resource Officer (a police officer who works in the school, short SRO)caught me in the hall around 8:30 to tell me that he'd heard from several students that C had told him that he'd been bragging about bring Jack Daniels to school, but he'd hid it during intramurals on the way to the bathroom. (I didn't tell the officer that I was the one who'd given him permission to leave the gym.) The SRO just told me to be on the look out and to ease drop on conversations.
I came back to my room and C was at his locker waiting for the custodian to unlock it. Apparently, another kid had put his lock on C's locker. But, C lost interest and left his bookbag in my teammate's room. So, when he was off to his class, we decided to search his bookbag. Lo and behold, I found a little Axe bottle in one of the many side pockets. I opened and smelled it; it was whiskey all right.
We decided to take the bottle up to the SRO who smelled to confirm our suspicions. It wasn't cologne. We took it to the principals, and they took it from there. C got charged with illegal substances and a ten-day suspension. He's fast-tracked to the bad kid school.
I came back to my room and C was at his locker waiting for the custodian to unlock it. Apparently, another kid had put his lock on C's locker. But, C lost interest and left his bookbag in my teammate's room. So, when he was off to his class, we decided to search his bookbag. Lo and behold, I found a little Axe bottle in one of the many side pockets. I opened and smelled it; it was whiskey all right.
We decided to take the bottle up to the SRO who smelled to confirm our suspicions. It wasn't cologne. We took it to the principals, and they took it from there. C got charged with illegal substances and a ten-day suspension. He's fast-tracked to the bad kid school.
Monday, February 1, 2010
CD Review: Mat Kearney's City of Black and White
(This was my first assignment for my freelance journalism class.)
My sister Susan is on top of all things new in pop culture because she has to be. It’s her passion… and job. Especially when it comes to music. In the music, nee the coolness department, I used to be an embarrassment to her; then as we matured, I progressed from a project to a challenge, and am now an opportunity. According to her, the work involved in making me cool is the equivalent to a second job. And, for the most part, I’m a willing recipient of her efforts in my coolness makeover.
For the most part… But, even little sisters need some self-respect. So, I resisted her recommendation of Mat Kearney based on the song “Nothing Left to Lose”. I turned the station whenever that song played because of its annoying chorus that reminded me of a preschool rhyme in how it extended the end of each line with an “ee-ee-ee”, demonstrating a serious error in judgment and taste.
However being the wily, persistent marketer she is, Susan slipped a Mat Kearney song onto a mix she sent me. Susan, aware of a) my strong aversion to Mat Kearney’s apparent lameness and b) my weakness for poetic lyrics, chose the perfect song. “What’s A Boy to Do” hooked me with the lines “Guess I’m looking for the right way to do this/ Guess I’m looking for the right things to call pretty” that got lodged in my psyche. It’s as if Mat and I became friends over a cup of coffee and great conversation. My sister is good at what she does.
But, it wasn’t until I bought “City of Black and White” that I became an official Mat Kearney fan. If that yellow CD had been fabric, it would be threadbare. Kearney is also good at what he does. He provided excellent thought-provoking company for my work commute for several months. He has intelligent, introspective lyrics that escape self-absorption. His gaze reaches above the rim of his belly button without coasting down the vapid road to pop.
He extracts the essence of the human condition from the mundane, foregoing sentimentality in order to reach something greater: compassion and connection. For example in “Closer to Love”, he sings, “She got the call today, one out of the grey/ And when the smoke cleared, it took her breath away/she said she didn’t believe, it could happen to me/ I guess we’re all one phone call from our knees/…. And don’t apologize for all the tears you’ve cried/you’ve been way too strong now for all your life….”
Then, with the chorus in “Lifeline”, he redeems the “ee-ee-ee” fiasco with these lyrics: “The world is too big never to ask why/ The answers don’t just fall from the sky/I’m fighting to live and feel alive….” Instead of wallowing with the emo kids in perpetual angst, Kearney wrestles with the black and white in order to grasp hope and meaning. He’s looking for the right thing to call pretty and invites us to join him.
My sister Susan is on top of all things new in pop culture because she has to be. It’s her passion… and job. Especially when it comes to music. In the music, nee the coolness department, I used to be an embarrassment to her; then as we matured, I progressed from a project to a challenge, and am now an opportunity. According to her, the work involved in making me cool is the equivalent to a second job. And, for the most part, I’m a willing recipient of her efforts in my coolness makeover.
For the most part… But, even little sisters need some self-respect. So, I resisted her recommendation of Mat Kearney based on the song “Nothing Left to Lose”. I turned the station whenever that song played because of its annoying chorus that reminded me of a preschool rhyme in how it extended the end of each line with an “ee-ee-ee”, demonstrating a serious error in judgment and taste.
However being the wily, persistent marketer she is, Susan slipped a Mat Kearney song onto a mix she sent me. Susan, aware of a) my strong aversion to Mat Kearney’s apparent lameness and b) my weakness for poetic lyrics, chose the perfect song. “What’s A Boy to Do” hooked me with the lines “Guess I’m looking for the right way to do this/ Guess I’m looking for the right things to call pretty” that got lodged in my psyche. It’s as if Mat and I became friends over a cup of coffee and great conversation. My sister is good at what she does.
But, it wasn’t until I bought “City of Black and White” that I became an official Mat Kearney fan. If that yellow CD had been fabric, it would be threadbare. Kearney is also good at what he does. He provided excellent thought-provoking company for my work commute for several months. He has intelligent, introspective lyrics that escape self-absorption. His gaze reaches above the rim of his belly button without coasting down the vapid road to pop.
He extracts the essence of the human condition from the mundane, foregoing sentimentality in order to reach something greater: compassion and connection. For example in “Closer to Love”, he sings, “She got the call today, one out of the grey/ And when the smoke cleared, it took her breath away/she said she didn’t believe, it could happen to me/ I guess we’re all one phone call from our knees/…. And don’t apologize for all the tears you’ve cried/you’ve been way too strong now for all your life….”
Then, with the chorus in “Lifeline”, he redeems the “ee-ee-ee” fiasco with these lyrics: “The world is too big never to ask why/ The answers don’t just fall from the sky/I’m fighting to live and feel alive….” Instead of wallowing with the emo kids in perpetual angst, Kearney wrestles with the black and white in order to grasp hope and meaning. He’s looking for the right thing to call pretty and invites us to join him.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Report Cards
First semester reports are going home this afternoon. I always loved report card day as a kid, but this isn't true for a lot of my kiddies. However, when I was looking at our team's report cards, I was humbled by how well some of the kids are doing in my class. We're talking the awkward, shy, "weird" kids-- they're rocking my class and failing the easier classes. Please don't get me wrong, other kids are failing my class. But, I find it so rewarding to have these social misfits trying and succeeding in my class. It feels like an A+.
Everytime this season comes around, I wish I had the power to issue report cards to more than my students. Say, some colleagues, bosses, businesses, family members and friends. Some cards would let them know what a great job they're doing: "you are so encouraging and kind-- you made my day three times in the past two months". Others would be a swift kick in the butt. Um, you're going to be an acquaintance a long time before you pass to friendship. Conduct needs improvement.
Plus, I'd like the no-nonsense feedback report cards for myself from loved ones, strangers, colleagues. I sometimes give into self-delusion. Apparently, lavendar isn't my color as my brother pointed out, and maybe I'm a little too free expressing my opinions and not so good at hearing others. A list of strengths and weaknesses is good. I always was strong at Language Arts and History but not so much in Math and Science. The trend continues.
Everytime this season comes around, I wish I had the power to issue report cards to more than my students. Say, some colleagues, bosses, businesses, family members and friends. Some cards would let them know what a great job they're doing: "you are so encouraging and kind-- you made my day three times in the past two months". Others would be a swift kick in the butt. Um, you're going to be an acquaintance a long time before you pass to friendship. Conduct needs improvement.
Plus, I'd like the no-nonsense feedback report cards for myself from loved ones, strangers, colleagues. I sometimes give into self-delusion. Apparently, lavendar isn't my color as my brother pointed out, and maybe I'm a little too free expressing my opinions and not so good at hearing others. A list of strengths and weaknesses is good. I always was strong at Language Arts and History but not so much in Math and Science. The trend continues.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
classy
So, I'm going to my Freelance Journalism class tonight. I'm excited and tired. What kind of people sign up for this kind of class... besides me, of course? And, is it going to rock my world and alter my path OR is it going to be a waste of money and time? Sometimes, you just have tiptoe out on the limb. No hands, no hands.
And, I'm getting excited about this job I know nothing about in a Harlem magnet school. I'm perfecting my personal statement so everybody's going to die wanting me. I can already hear the Academic Deans panting and I'm not even to my rough draft.
Speaking of, my classes are going really well this week. I'm slowing things down-- adding five minutes more than instinct tells me. And, the kids seem more motivated. It's counterintuitive. Plus, I started a reading log with lots of columns (I'm going to institute graph paper next and let them make bar graphs of their pages and hours read. They're going to love it!)
I bought opera tickets on a whim Monday for Saturday as one is want to do. Yea, now they're forecasting for snow. Yikes. La Boheme. La Natural Disaster.
I need to study for my Praxis tests.
And, I'm getting excited about this job I know nothing about in a Harlem magnet school. I'm perfecting my personal statement so everybody's going to die wanting me. I can already hear the Academic Deans panting and I'm not even to my rough draft.
Speaking of, my classes are going really well this week. I'm slowing things down-- adding five minutes more than instinct tells me. And, the kids seem more motivated. It's counterintuitive. Plus, I started a reading log with lots of columns (I'm going to institute graph paper next and let them make bar graphs of their pages and hours read. They're going to love it!)
I bought opera tickets on a whim Monday for Saturday as one is want to do. Yea, now they're forecasting for snow. Yikes. La Boheme. La Natural Disaster.
I need to study for my Praxis tests.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
wacko, presto
Today was a wackfest from start to finish. I enjoyed my classes overall, but had way too many meetings about the impending doom that is the field trip on Friday. It has catastrophe stamped in huge red letters all over it-- but we cannot abort this mission. The kids are gung ho, the money collected, the arrangements made, the permission slips collected, etc.
Then I sat through a two-hour mandatory meeting about... I don't know what. It was colossal waste of a lot of people's time. I have no idea what the objective of the meeting was.
Then, I made the strategic mistake of browsing in the relationship section of the bookstore after finding the single copy of Zinser's On Writing Well for my class that begins tomorrow. My god, I was depressed and crestfallen after scanning some of those books. Not only that, but I'm forever branded a loser for even being seen in the self-help aisle. People should shop for those kind of books through the privacy of the internet.
But, then I ate a vat of leftover spaghetti and headed to the library to work on my personal statement. Writing is a mood enhancer as is running. More effective than most things actually. Now, if it weren't too late and dark for a run. I'd be fully recovered.
Then I sat through a two-hour mandatory meeting about... I don't know what. It was colossal waste of a lot of people's time. I have no idea what the objective of the meeting was.
Then, I made the strategic mistake of browsing in the relationship section of the bookstore after finding the single copy of Zinser's On Writing Well for my class that begins tomorrow. My god, I was depressed and crestfallen after scanning some of those books. Not only that, but I'm forever branded a loser for even being seen in the self-help aisle. People should shop for those kind of books through the privacy of the internet.
But, then I ate a vat of leftover spaghetti and headed to the library to work on my personal statement. Writing is a mood enhancer as is running. More effective than most things actually. Now, if it weren't too late and dark for a run. I'd be fully recovered.
Monday, January 25, 2010
my pyramid
No, King Tut has not come back from the dead. Instead, the FDA has come out with a nifty website to tout their wares and justify all the tax money we spend on them. It is My Pyramid. I found this while coming up with a nutrition center for my Language Arts class. I thought it would be a fun project for my students to build a week's menu. You might too.
Friday, January 22, 2010
feeling motivated?
I'm having a hard time getting motivated. I need to start using To Do Lists or some form of task management. It's not as if I don't have work to do, goals, and need for self-improvement. Being a lump on a log floating down a river is just easier some days.
I've lessened the workload for my students in my classes in the hope that might motivate them. I've gotten feedback that I don't give them enough time to finish their activities. I'm just paranoid of free time in the hands of unruly seventh graders-- it's the stuff nightmares are made of. So, it's kind of working. And, I'm getting my centers ready, which I'm UBER excited about. They're creative and exciting-- interactive and outside the box. For example, I've collected loads of cartoons and I'm going to have the kids locate the figurative language: pun, personification, alliteration, etc. in them. Then, they are to design their own. I also have ones with maps and art. I have a passport from the Holocaust museum and some other material. Then, there's a matching game with the elements of story and a grouping game with parts of speech. And, today I'm putting together one with settings, characters, and plot (pictures from magazines and newspapers)that they write a story about. They're what school should be like but can't be when you have 28 children who don't know classroom protocol.
Maybe it's the weather. Cold and gray, dreary and listless.
But, I have had some manufactured sunshine: I received my interlinear Bibles from Cosy. I got in touch with N with whom I hadn't talked with since before Christmas. Had carrot soup with friends. I've had two solid runs. I signed up for a writing class for the next six weeks on Wednesdays 7-9pm.
Today's resolutions: get my grades entered and to the secretary. Finish two centers. Get some exercise or go to a movie. Clean the house.
I've lessened the workload for my students in my classes in the hope that might motivate them. I've gotten feedback that I don't give them enough time to finish their activities. I'm just paranoid of free time in the hands of unruly seventh graders-- it's the stuff nightmares are made of. So, it's kind of working. And, I'm getting my centers ready, which I'm UBER excited about. They're creative and exciting-- interactive and outside the box. For example, I've collected loads of cartoons and I'm going to have the kids locate the figurative language: pun, personification, alliteration, etc. in them. Then, they are to design their own. I also have ones with maps and art. I have a passport from the Holocaust museum and some other material. Then, there's a matching game with the elements of story and a grouping game with parts of speech. And, today I'm putting together one with settings, characters, and plot (pictures from magazines and newspapers)that they write a story about. They're what school should be like but can't be when you have 28 children who don't know classroom protocol.
Maybe it's the weather. Cold and gray, dreary and listless.
But, I have had some manufactured sunshine: I received my interlinear Bibles from Cosy. I got in touch with N with whom I hadn't talked with since before Christmas. Had carrot soup with friends. I've had two solid runs. I signed up for a writing class for the next six weeks on Wednesdays 7-9pm.
Today's resolutions: get my grades entered and to the secretary. Finish two centers. Get some exercise or go to a movie. Clean the house.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
unexpected
So, I cooked Indian food today. I had planned on finishing Disgrace, working on my resume and personal statement, writing emails to international people about visiting and maybe teaching, writing in my journal and working on a story, and working out. But, instead, I cooked soup, and spinach,and pureed cauliflower. I figured out how to peel ginger root (with a teaspoon). And, I've been wanting to cook something "Indian" for awhile. The house that I'm dogsitting in has a great kitchen; so, it seemed the perfect opportunity.
I hesitate to call it "Indian". Firstly, I got the recipes off the internet and bought all the ingredients at the local Harris Teeter. Secondly, I was listening to Alison Krauss while cooking-- surely that messes with the ethnic mojo. Now if it were pintos, greens and cornbread-- we'd be golden. Thirdly, I was the cook-- um, I have some Indian friends. But, less face it, Butter Chicken is one of my favorite Indian dishes.
And, Maggie barfed three times tonight just before 10pm. Don't worry: she only threw up on carpet. Why barf on tile or wood when you can hurl on pale blue carpet? I started to use sarcasm on her, then I realized that it would be wasted.
I had an interesting lunch with my pastor today. We met to talk about my teaching a Sunday School class, but we spent a majority of the time talking theology and church dynamics.
Spring break: I need to decide between Philadelphia and Charleston & Savannah. I'm leaning towards C&S because of weather and apparently that's when a lot of the mansions are open to the public.
Internet is very tempting this weekend. I don't know if that means I should get internet at home as to build up my tolerance or use this weekend as a warning.
I hesitate to call it "Indian". Firstly, I got the recipes off the internet and bought all the ingredients at the local Harris Teeter. Secondly, I was listening to Alison Krauss while cooking-- surely that messes with the ethnic mojo. Now if it were pintos, greens and cornbread-- we'd be golden. Thirdly, I was the cook-- um, I have some Indian friends. But, less face it, Butter Chicken is one of my favorite Indian dishes.
And, Maggie barfed three times tonight just before 10pm. Don't worry: she only threw up on carpet. Why barf on tile or wood when you can hurl on pale blue carpet? I started to use sarcasm on her, then I realized that it would be wasted.
I had an interesting lunch with my pastor today. We met to talk about my teaching a Sunday School class, but we spent a majority of the time talking theology and church dynamics.
Spring break: I need to decide between Philadelphia and Charleston & Savannah. I'm leaning towards C&S because of weather and apparently that's when a lot of the mansions are open to the public.
Internet is very tempting this weekend. I don't know if that means I should get internet at home as to build up my tolerance or use this weekend as a warning.
Influence
I don't read Runner's World for its profundity. Nonetheless, I happened upon it in the newbie article, "A Mile in His Shoes". It's a dad chatting about his 6 year-old wanted to run a mile with him. The author goes on to talk about how as herd animals we normalize behavior for each other. I found the article inspiring as a 7th grade teacher. Maybe, I have a bigger impact than subject-verb agreement even as important as good grammar is. And, I gained hope as a Christian: our lifestyle does impact people. Maybe my driving a jalopy of a car so that I have money for other things might normalize a certain thought pattern of generosity and wants vs needs. Who knows?
I agree with the author's thesis because I've experienced it. I have been deeply influenced by those around me for good and bad. My friends affect my interests. I know I read Runner's World to be surrounded by runners while I have no one to run with-- it reminds me that running an hour is completely normal and a good use of time.
I agree with the author's thesis because I've experienced it. I have been deeply influenced by those around me for good and bad. My friends affect my interests. I know I read Runner's World to be surrounded by runners while I have no one to run with-- it reminds me that running an hour is completely normal and a good use of time.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
phone calls
Kudos to Alexander Graham Bell! The phone is a wonderful invention. I had two lovely conversations last night: one with my sister and another with a friend in Vancouver. That couldn't have happened a hundred years ago. The connections were much needed after a rough day. Teaching is very relational.
I read half of trito-Isaiah (Isa 55-66 or thereabouts). It's pretty intense but very beautiful. Reading the Bible provides context for all the mundanity of life-- there is a big picture-- and our decisions do matter.
I'm in the midst of planning (classes, new jobs?, summer, teaching a class at church, vacations, etc). It's exciting and stressful. A good stress-- I want to make good decisions. I'm straying away from the concept of the right decision in these types of decisions.
I read half of trito-Isaiah (Isa 55-66 or thereabouts). It's pretty intense but very beautiful. Reading the Bible provides context for all the mundanity of life-- there is a big picture-- and our decisions do matter.
I'm in the midst of planning (classes, new jobs?, summer, teaching a class at church, vacations, etc). It's exciting and stressful. A good stress-- I want to make good decisions. I'm straying away from the concept of the right decision in these types of decisions.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
S'wonderful
As I was driving my 89 yo friend home from church, Diana Krall's version of "S'Wonderful" started playing and Virg started singing along between complaining about all the jackasses on the road. I'd been mildly annoyed all morning, but that impromptu sing-a-long did way more for my soul than "Come Thou Font" and "When I Survey The Wondrous Cross". Whenever, I'm annoyed at church it always reminds me of The Screwtape Letters. I think my annoyance level is directly linked to the fact I haven't run in nearly two weeks. I've been sick, and it's been stinking cold. Yoga is not substitute for running. And, I need to journal.
You'll be relieved to know that I'm deliberating on what writing courses (and cooking) to take. Travel, writing for healing, entertainment and journalism. Dude, this blog might get good. Crazy. Don't hold your breath.
You'll be relieved to know that I'm deliberating on what writing courses (and cooking) to take. Travel, writing for healing, entertainment and journalism. Dude, this blog might get good. Crazy. Don't hold your breath.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
happy new year
Things are crazy hectic here. And, my mental climate is especially good. I'm really looking forward to this year. All the uncertainty feels kind of exciting. I'm trying to decide what trips to plan-- where to work-- what classes to take (cooking, writing, dance)-- what books to read-- what magazines to subscribe to. I feel like the 14 year old I used to be. Boisterous and silly. Unincumbered. I worked on some new slacks with Geneva today. I'm getting ready to meet AL for an early dinner.
School is going well. I got observed yesterday. It was no dog and pony show, but it went well. I'll see what the AP thinks soon enough.
I'm finishing up Elizabeth Strout's Abide With Me. It's quite good. Subtle and thought-provoking. A sneaky profound. I talked to some long lost friends, which always puts a spring in my step. I loaded up some holiday photos onto FB, which made me smile.
School is going well. I got observed yesterday. It was no dog and pony show, but it went well. I'll see what the AP thinks soon enough.
I'm finishing up Elizabeth Strout's Abide With Me. It's quite good. Subtle and thought-provoking. A sneaky profound. I talked to some long lost friends, which always puts a spring in my step. I loaded up some holiday photos onto FB, which made me smile.
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