depletion

I don't know why I find job applications so depleting, but I do. I applied to about seven jobs yesterday (about 3-4 hours of actual work) and was exhausted. I applied to two today and am tired. I'm less surprised and irritated by how redundant the applications are. Today's I had to fill out my reference information in two separate locations on the same internet application. One was in an Excel format and one was in Word. Seriously. I sometimes think it's some form of psychological test to see if you have what it takes to survive the bureaucratic mechanisms of the institution. "Dance, monkey, dance."

It's weird trying to maintain an identity separate from this uphill battle. Working out is helping. Prayer is definitely helping. This has made me realize the holes in my social network around here... again. I have more friends in DC, New York and Seattle than I do here. I need to reach out more to the people I know here, and figure out ways to branch out. And, I need to do all this with spending as little money as possible. Yes? Yes. I hang on to the possibility that I'm learning something profound and pragmatic and building character.