Do you remember the SNL skit with Will Ferrell: "I cannot control the volume of MY VOICE!"? I feel like that. I cannot control the volume or direction of my emotions! I'm having a hard time concentrating. Writing and reading are too much for most of the day. So, I walk the dog. Or pray. Or clean. Or check my email or Craig's List or Facebook.
I got my eyebrows done today for the interview tomorrow. I didn't want to look scary. I love my "brow artist"; she's really cool. But, we were talking about my interview and discussed discernment and she gave me this prayer to pray every morning: "I trust God to guide me to the place where I can use my abilities effectively and constructively. The way to my right place of my employment is now open." The last part sounds a little Oprah and a little less Bible. But, as my uncle wrote, "Sometimes urgency is the catalyst for persistence." This is definitely true in my prayer life. However, what I like about my "brow artist's" prayer is the reminder that God has given me abilities and the world has need of them. Maybe I should read the story of baby Moses and his nannies to get psyched up for the interview. But, I feel like I've lost my moorings. Who am I? What do I want? What purpose do I serve? These questions are little demons who sick on me when I try to go to sleep right now.
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